Creative Butterflies

When somewhere in the Horizon
All you see you light,
Do you wonder ever,
Why is it so bright?
When somewhere in the horizon
you see the drawing cloud,
Do you wonder ever,
How late shall it be
Till am drowned tonight?
When somewhere in the horizon
You see the smiling moon,
Do you wonder ever,
In just 15 days,
It will be gone soon..
As the night draws close
I stare at the dusky horizon,
Admiring the setting sun,
The playing lights,
Wishing
Tomorrow will be brighter than tonight.
As the day draws closer,
The fear gets clearer,
And I hear myself repeating...
Don't Worry, It will be soon over,
And It would seem -
Just like another day, of every year...

Ahhaaa, I tell myself..
yes, just another day, another year, another goal, another soul, another fool, another school....
will continue forever... !!

"Creative butterfly Sparks before Qualifier's. Reserved my marriage Hall...today, 204 :) "

Every Dog has its day :-))

" Friends and associates suddenly come out of the shadows, bringing out your light and energy. There is a thrilling sense of spontaneity that is charging up these casual relationships, brightening your world. You are on an amusement park joy ride, so let go of your need to be in control. You deserve to have a good time.

By Rick Levine

Tuesday, August 28, 2007...... "

he he he... funny... the last thing that I wanted to hear... using a cheesy color for cheese matter.. had cheese sandwich today :-) .. life offlate has been cheesy.. am not being skeptic.. but just amazed... enjoying the extra cheese but sorry can't be NOT KEEPING A WATCH ON IT, have to start workout... as soon as it gets too much... or even starts heading to settle in the adipose tissue !!

AWESOME..........music and composition...

I do not understand much the science of music, but after a long time I came across all the songs, musical pieces of a single movie worth saying 'GREAT' - composition, lyrics, music, ... everything..

look forward to the movie... LOVED the theme line "Think before you dream, You might not be ready when it actually happens." this has happened to me more than just... once... cheers to life and living... highly unlikely that movie would be a disappointment given that each and every musical composition .. is awesome... I guess 'Good cannot be just partial' ... :) its the basic nature of goodness... to be influence in totality...

I, My, Me.....

Where is the end of the boundary of 'I' , 'My', and "Me'.....??? I have been bugged with this quest..for ages and it seems to have become more relevant and prominent with the present.. there is so much I's and My's that its hard to just breath at times... I feel suffocated...

Is there ever possible to go and see beyond the I's and My's - my country, my wife, my children, my son, my daughter, my husband.. !! Is it possible to the beyond one's your focused and trapped within the I's and My's? Is it possible to still simultaneously see both the extremes of I's, My's to 'Us' and 'None'? Is the I' a strict boundary of the Self, or it can be and is the boundless 'I' which I have constrained myself with my limited vision and awareness? Is or Are the 'I' and 'My' a real trap or the only way to see their or its boundless form and existence? Is there a clear answer to this? Is there an answer at all?

Will I ever find the answer, or has the I already led me the answer, and I am not believing it? or am I still to discover more? or Am I just making significant progress towards the neurologically challenged existence?

... on a tangential note 'The EYE Of Mordor' that watches Sam Baggins :))

Sweet Nothings...

Good morning... India

Spend Thrift..........

" Making a tough financial decision could be your big challenge of the day. One part of you wants to spend the money without sticking to your budget. But you know that an impulsive purchase might not be the smartest move. You can get the best of both worlds by buying something relatively inexpensive like lunch, a book, or a CD, while putting off a major buy until you have enough time to do more research and think it over carefully................."


he he... too late honey, I have already spent it :) I have big holes in my hand.. and I don't mind it.. Don't know if thats a good or bad trait.. all I know is I love to spend.. till I have.. when I don't there is nothing to spend :) .... however I do offlate ask the question, Do I want it? If the answer is not a strong 'YES' I let go of it... but this is ONLY when I spend it on myself... 'self pampering' and I have tons of those.. for e.g.,

chocolate, flowers, good food - pampering quota no1. Rate - weekly
groceries, rent, and similar stuff - survival quota. Rate - weekly
Bike, Car - Luxury quota Rate - 1 in 2 - 3 years, rare event!
Music, Books - intellectual, relaxing, happiness, realizing, fun Quota. Rate - 1 in 2 months, :)
Travel and Journey - Masti, Seeing the World quota. Rate - 1 a year
Clothes - Not Done shopping for long Quota, GET HIGHEST ATTACKS of this.. BUT I survive, :) Rate - 1 in 6 - 8 months

NOW that was just ME, MY , I 'pampering' , there is a whole Pandora Box on 'I just felt like giving, Quota' and I love it.. am just glad, lucky and thankful for giving me the resources to be able to act on it.. whenever I feel it.. thanks to the universe for this gift... (posted 10am)

********************888
Spend Thrift -II

GUESS WHAT??? ANY GUESSES?

OK at 12.01 Pm I realize I am missing the thing called 'Purse' searched every where.. office, bag, desk, restroom, road..if i dropped it some where ...

places I visited today before coming to school - Smiths, Transit Center, Ice Cream corner.. NO TRACE of my 'cash and identity holder' ... lost my identity :)) he he... sounds and reads funny... i was laughing all the while, as I was remembering the above post all day.. as I kept looking and searching for it... and trying to back track in my memory to see where I could have forgotten it..

I was sure no body stole it, and was equally sure that I forgot it. My Present Mindedness :)
so an hold on my THRIFTINESS... for some time..yeeeeee... no money in the first place to be able to spend...
*********************
Spend Thrift -III

My happiness did not last for long.. 6 pm.. I took the CVN bus back home to get my bike and then go to land lady and get keys to my apartment.. as a matter of habit I never carry my keys anywhere else other than my pocket since I remember things till I can feel there existence.. else am lost.. or they are lost to me.. BUT today I choose to put it nicely in an organized way in the purse, which also I never carry... or use... I am a back pack person... dump everything in that backpack types... !!

Anyway.. got into the bus, and asked the driver, " hey did you come across any purse.... "
I could not even finish my sentence and saw the fellow, grinning from the driver's side, smiling and saying... "AM HERE, Hiiii, Ice Scream early morning is bad for memory"

Stupid Unrelated Dumb Correlation... !!

BUT who says every time everything always have to follow a nice well defined significant correlation specially when >80% of reality is Grey and Fuzzy !!

Elements of the Matrix [X ] !

Empty mind is X's workshop.

A simple plain mathematical equation which is linearly related to TIME...
elements of the set X is a function of who or what is the most influential particle within a 24hr cycle in a day for a week.

Potential 'Influentials' are an indicators of what you are most susceptible to or what you are essentially, like for now I AM entirely SUSCEPTIBLE TO BAKWAAS, ME AND MYSELF... hence spending worthless time to even write such crap...

I think if one monitors the occupants of X in one's life then do a time series analysis on it I think one can almost accurately map or identify their own personalities.. to eventually answer questions like " I want, I like, I am ...." etc

On a lighter NOTE.....STOP THINKING....FOCUS AND ACT...... DO NOT ENTER THE CELL ..

"DOGS AND TANU" NOT ALLOWED

:O ... SURPRIZED... AT THE COINCIDENCE

"How could it be so true...? This is exactly what has been up on my head /heart and mind for almost a month... there is a path that is calling me.. that is surrounding me, that is absorbing me.. in totality.. I want to go there.. but what do I do with my current responsibilities, commitments? I don't have an answer! I for sure know that I enjoy every step I take in walking towards that goal.. I cannot let go of the lost connection that came back to me ... its there... and its calling me.. and its paining from inside from not going or walking into it.. If and only if I did not have the current responsibility...what IF the current IS the last responsibility and commitment? Can I do that? Will it be that? Is this what life has been telling me and I have been just deaf and dumb to have not seen it and heard it till now? The choice is very simple... and easy.. and I know I want to make.. it.. as nothing has been so beautiful ever.. every moment every thought seems that I am engrossed in it.. or rather it consumes me.... Life, I am letting you decide and take me where I ought to be... some of my honest thoughts.. that have never been so clear and distinct to me ever...... "

You might be unsure about where you are going in your career these days, even if your role in the outer world is important to you. You wonder if you should pursue your career or maybe place more attention on the inner dimensions of your soul. There are no quick and easy answers to this existential dilemma. Simplify the issues as much as you can and then let yourself feel what it's like to know that you don't know.

By Rick Levine

Monday, August 13, 2007

Kya Sunil Babu !

"Nay gahr, Nayi gari, Nayi Biwi ... *(*#&*)*)(*)... " - ASIAN PAINTS, paint your life new.. :))

WISH......................

............................. there was an end to pondering.... and thought... and

wish ............. there was no need to wish anymore.............
...................................................... that's how it got lost......... in time...and...life....
...............................................................................wish................

..........................................................................................
.................................................................................................................

..............................

feel like writing ... but then... its only........ a ...wish.... ......
...........................and they lived happily ever after... (usual Enid Blyton, ending)...

I was bored of it..long time back :) ....

Ommitted

the Life
the Dream
all that you Thought
and Dreamt,
has touched You
finally.

the Sunshine
the Dawn
that you Thought
had Left,
has Returned
finally.

for you and only You
bliss, life, peace
is on its Way
to Be
forever for You
exactly
as you Wished,
just Yesterday,
as all the Confusions
about Fusion,
Certainties
about Uncertainties,
get Omitted and Sorted
as you get 'Committed'
for Life and Death...

:).. to one of my life line(Margi).. and another parallel line(Deepti)...

A Latter fram Jaswantho..urf (Jassi )

Pyare Puttar,

I am in a well here and hoping you are also in a well there. I'm writing this letter slowly, because I know you cannot read fast. We don't live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in the newspaper that most accidents happen 20 miles from home, so we moved 20 miles. I won't
be able to send the address as the last Sardar who stayed here took the house numbers with them for their new house so they would not have to change their address. Hopefully by next week we will be able to take our earlier address plate here, and that our address will remain same too.

This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine, situated right above the toilet I'm not
sure it works too well. Last week I put in 3 shirts, pulled the chain and haven't seen them since.
The weather here isn't too bad. It rained only twice last week. The first time it rained for 3 days and second time for 4 days. The coat you wanted me to send you, your Aunt said it would be a little too heavy to send in the mail with all the metal buttons, so we cut them off and put them in the pocket. Your father has another job. He has 500 men under him. He is cutting the grass at the cemetery.

Your sister had a baby this morning. I haven't found out whether it is a girl or a boy, so I don't know whether you are an Aunt or Uncle. Your uncle, Jetinder fell in the nearby well. Some men tried to pull him out, but he fought them off bravely and drowned. We cremated him and he
burned for three days.

Your best friend, Balwinder, is no more. He died trying to fulfil his father's last wishes. His father had wished to be buried in the sea after he died. And your friend died while in the process of digging a grave for his father. There isn't much more news this time. Nothing much has happened. Wanted to write longer but the envelope is already sealed.

Live long
Your dear mother
Jaswanto

Perceptions....

Everything that happens is an accident, you have to just find context and reason to feel good about it - 'offlate realization'

God is Helpless

I always wondered what does he do when he see's his children, his affectionate creation in pain? With time I have gathered he feels helpless.. and he suffers too... so much so that he eventually starts talking to us.. through our inner self and gives us the strength to fight, to live, to be able to breath.. he feels the pain as much as he feels their joy... but he can't do anything.. because he just doesn't have the power.. he feels more saddened when he see's some of his children just look up to him for answers... he hates to just look at them with benevolent eyes and offer no immediate solution...but just to tell them have faith in themselves and time....he is just an observer and observer who feels but has no powers to ease you immediately.. he is none but something like our parents whom we are significant part....whom we are connected... through an invisible bond....that makes them feel our pain and joy... exactly as we feel it.. a bond that can never be broken or seen for real but can only be felt.. a power, a strength that helps us live.. and smile..gives us faith and hope.. such is god....a beautiful loving, ever giving compassionate observer... do not curse him or her when in pain.. do not ask him questions.. that you do not know either... he is none but you and your own self... your own inner self, your soul, your heart ... if the whole world was told that he is none but your own faith I guess the world would collapse.. he is none but the one .. you feel when you close your eyes.. he in none but the voice that talks to you, will be always with you... even when you go blind... he is just your thought that would stay and be with all the thoughts that you have let go out of your mind.. so wish the well being of all those you think are hurt and in pain.. he too will wish the same and his thoughts along with many such thoughts from different sources... will take care of the souls.. you care about... this is why I guess.. our Vedas and Upanishads have told us to be loving, giving, and compassionate..

"these thoughts just came up on their own... as I see three of my beloved friends in pain..I wish there was a magic wand to ease them.. but there is none... since there exists none... all were honest, righteous, perfect from their own end.. yet some are in pain, some in gain...I send my best wishes and thoughts too.. to help them wade through these...days..."

I guess the question why is there so much pain becomes pointless now.. as it exists only with gain... and will always exist this way.. we need to just look forward to let the wheel role.. and progress... phew.. interesting is life... with the 'BALANCE' as the only answer to everything you get!!! Man... no wonder that I decided rather I was sent or chosen to study Ecology... the BALANCE of NATURE !!!!