I am totally at loss of word after hearing from Rick! I have known him only for 3 - 4 months, but he seems to know me just as close as perfect. We communicate mostly over email. Never met, Never spoke!
Off late I have been really tired and more so, bored of having to deal with the same problems, variables and factors time and again. I saw the problem an I knew the answer but did not want to waste my time in solving it. I think am more bored than tired, to be honest. I hate repeatability. So I choose not to think, and just plug in the variables I need to get done with it.
The only change I introduced this time was constant follow up on the feedback or response of the system. The model performed exactly as predicted. But now what next? Am really bored !!
So bored that I did not feel any triumph on conquering or successfully executing the model. Whether its Matlab or R the model performs equally well in every domain and is consistent over time. From what I learnt and still learning one needs to just know how to address a matrix and the associated functions operating on it in either. Once, you know that, thrown in any matrix, with any loops and functions, it will perform the same, at a consistently significant high adjusted R square, ;) !
Except that inspite of the above boring schedule for months and years now, it was refreshing post the 8 mins rainfall... in midst of broad day light all of a sudden. I had gone out for lunch with my regular visitor. It seemed as if the clouds were conspiring against me, and were waiting to strike in time. In nutshell, short and sweet. Unlike dragging rainy day, making the whole day dull!
But even that's repeatative, :) Give me some new challenge! Something different, Will you?
And when I talk to Rick about this, he just tells me to continue remaining familiar with the process.....
"You could get tired when the cosmos just says more of the same old thing. It's a familiar message for you, but today it feels easier as sweet Venus harmonizes with your key planet Pluto. Go to the depths, then go even deeper. Let go of control. Feel it all -- the love and the pain. You already know that your thoughts are merely a distraction. Magical metamorphosis is ready to happen if you let it."
I don't know what magical metamorphosis he is talking about, specially with Harry Potter, gone! As if I am some insect, metamorphosing from egg, larvae, pupae in a cocoon to a butterfly then mate in the air, :) and die after laying eggs for next generation of butterflies to flourish and survive :)) , as a species !!
Thoughts " am I an insect then ? '' thinking till I find the answer :) "....aaah..crap...usual crap I think..or am I ???"
--------- thus continued her thoughts as the streaks of red got brighter and brighter cutting her skin, while she slept in the White Room, # 408, Bosnia Cancer Society..a mobile rings somewhere...and the voice says, Rick... come to the hospital, the time has come---------------
# all the thoughts inspired by recent happening, and known people diagnosed of cancer#
Off late I have been really tired and more so, bored of having to deal with the same problems, variables and factors time and again. I saw the problem an I knew the answer but did not want to waste my time in solving it. I think am more bored than tired, to be honest. I hate repeatability. So I choose not to think, and just plug in the variables I need to get done with it.
The only change I introduced this time was constant follow up on the feedback or response of the system. The model performed exactly as predicted. But now what next? Am really bored !!
So bored that I did not feel any triumph on conquering or successfully executing the model. Whether its Matlab or R the model performs equally well in every domain and is consistent over time. From what I learnt and still learning one needs to just know how to address a matrix and the associated functions operating on it in either. Once, you know that, thrown in any matrix, with any loops and functions, it will perform the same, at a consistently significant high adjusted R square, ;) !
Except that inspite of the above boring schedule for months and years now, it was refreshing post the 8 mins rainfall... in midst of broad day light all of a sudden. I had gone out for lunch with my regular visitor. It seemed as if the clouds were conspiring against me, and were waiting to strike in time. In nutshell, short and sweet. Unlike dragging rainy day, making the whole day dull!
But even that's repeatative, :) Give me some new challenge! Something different, Will you?
And when I talk to Rick about this, he just tells me to continue remaining familiar with the process.....
"You could get tired when the cosmos just says more of the same old thing. It's a familiar message for you, but today it feels easier as sweet Venus harmonizes with your key planet Pluto. Go to the depths, then go even deeper. Let go of control. Feel it all -- the love and the pain. You already know that your thoughts are merely a distraction. Magical metamorphosis is ready to happen if you let it."
I don't know what magical metamorphosis he is talking about, specially with Harry Potter, gone! As if I am some insect, metamorphosing from egg, larvae, pupae in a cocoon to a butterfly then mate in the air, :) and die after laying eggs for next generation of butterflies to flourish and survive :)) , as a species !!
Thoughts " am I an insect then ? '' thinking till I find the answer :) "....aaah..crap...usual crap I think..or am I ???"
--------- thus continued her thoughts as the streaks of red got brighter and brighter cutting her skin, while she slept in the White Room, # 408, Bosnia Cancer Society..a mobile rings somewhere...and the voice says, Rick... come to the hospital, the time has come---------------
# all the thoughts inspired by recent happening, and known people diagnosed of cancer#
No comments:
Post a Comment