Making Love and Sex

Have you ever wondered - how and if the above two acts are different?
My recent flare writing about relationships and every tiny miny details of a relationship is the strong urge to think aloud 'what I want' in my mind... and be clear about things as much as possible...

So, the other day I had a date. It was with a friend I had known for a while but I have never been romantically or hormonally attracted towards him. It was one my best dates right from the time the 'ring' on the door bell. I had never seen this side of my friend. All these days whenever he came to pick me up for our bike ride he would be banging at the door as if he is playing a tabla..singing aloud in his uncoordinated off tune voice...and every time he showed up... I would open the door to a unshaven, messy guy, with his shirt half out, half tucked in, loose jeans, with dirt, dust and paint all over and a stupid blue cap backwards...

He would barely kick the shoes off his feat, open the fridge grab the beer can, or juice, or something...finish it one gulp and then....scream at the top of his voice 'tanu, lets go lets go....'

So impatient! Always in a hurry! as if he always running...he is a tornado, lost in his own world... the longer he is in my apartment the stronger I feel a earthquake and everything rambling... restless and impatient..but the good thing is he is always like this, so he is consistent with his restlessness :) my friend is pretty much aware of this opinion of him as I do not take any attempt to hide it either. but the best thing about him is ' he smiles at whatever I say or anybody says to him' He is pretty clear of how he is and does not care about what other think about him... above all.. he has a big, a Million dollar smile, on him always... so even if he is a tornado, he is the best...and I like him... had it been not for his smile, I think he would have been a total turn off to me. Well for me, even to be friends and be interacting with someone there has to be some passion, some magic, some energy... some excitement.. the brilliant combo of 'smiles and energy' made him the perfect, my best friend. Sometimes I used to just call him a 'mood' lifter specially during PMS days... he is the perfect doze of energy you need during those days.. he would never get the reasons of my small mood swings but he would be like .. you are getting more irritated today than other days... the best thing with him is it..that you have to know to modulate him, in his ways.. some how after spending 3 long years with him I just knew how to control him as well :) ... and he knew how to control me :) ... we did it silently in complete knowledge of each other but without spelling it out... to put it correct 'he let me control him, and I did the same too' ok, so we had the sweetest and best relationship ever of simple love, affection, honesty, disappointment, anger... everything was very simple with him since he has a mirror face, smile and heart. Every thought in his heart will be written in bold letters on his face or he will just say it. So, basically there were lot of reasons for me to tolerate his tornado-ish behavior or attitude.

So, back to what I was saying - we had the best chemistry devoid of hormones. It was a personal choice and decision by both. We just did not want to screw up what we had.. I think we both believed that falling or rising in love has got more to do with mind..and BF-GF relationship need not be the only bonding to express it... and one can be totally platonic and still love the other person equally...

anyway...so this was one the PMS days.. i was off...and irritated.. so I called him..and said...i need a mood lifter.. he was like 'yes, maam at your service' I got more irritated...and told him he need not come if he is buzy.... he was like OK, and hung up the phone... I was so mad at him and screamed in my mind ' insensitive, inconsistent, unemotional, uncaring, stubborn pig; am not going to talk to him; takes me for granted; bla bla bla'

There was no reason for me to think this way...but at that point I was myself under the influence of my hormones 'PMS' so I was overly sensitive and emotional.. anyway...so I go back to reading my book. In 30 mins my door bell goes 'ting tong'

I drag myself out of my lousy bed..and open the door....and what I had infront of me was unimaginable!

A million dollar smile, a twinkle in the eye, a clean shaved face, no dirty blue cap, no chewing gum, no dog chain around the neck, a blue shirt, ironed and well tugged into his jeans, clean pair of sneakers with the lace tied in, and above all totally off the belt 'bunch of flowers (carnation) ' staring at my face

I stood at my door for 5 mins, in my pajama's, staring at this guy, whom I had never seen before.
"hello" queen of get lost - get ready we are going out for dinner. ...

me - wao.....what's wrong with you? why are you being so nice.

"nothing is wrong with me. something is wrong with you. now get ready..i have reserved the place for dinner"

me - wait wait you actually reserved a place for dinner. you mean you had the time to call the resturant and reserve a place for us..

"yes, queen of get lost. now don't waste my and your precious time. lets go"

he pushed me into the rest room and locked the door.
as I was taking shower, I was thinking for the first time. Man, he would make such a nice BF. So romantic and sensitive. So, I took almost 30 - 45 mins to get ready I think. And to my surprise he did not even scream ones! He was listening to music, silent and calm. I did not feel his tornedo-ish effect at all.

So I got ready and was putting on my heels, when he came from behind, tapped on my shoulder, and said 'you look gorgeous'; pulled my cheek and said ' all you need to look priceless is a smile' ...
he held my back and stepped me out of the apartment, locking the door behind him and handing me back they keys. He had his left arm on my shoulder as we were walking. We talked our way to the place he had reserved. I wanted to take my car. He insisted on walking. I don't what was wrong with me that day 'I was listening to everything he was saying'. Am never like that.. It felt as if I am just following his silent instruction with full consent and my own willingness. I felt I was doing it for him more than doing for myself.. I was very silent...as I was recording all these things, each and everything he was doing in my head... and enjoying each and every second, every moment. Every moment of him that day felt like bliss. So, we walked and talked...much less than we usually do... he did ask couple of times why was I silent. I had no answers...I did not want to answer I guess...I only kept him asking 'whats wrong with you? why are you so nice today?' he never answered my question but kept smiling... and we talked our usual daily chorus... him, her, she, bla bla bla...

we reached the place he had reserved..it was our favorite dining. the waiter took us to the place marked reserved. we used to stop here on our way home from bike ride. So it was a nice, warm, small and inexpensive place which we both could afford. a very common hang out place. but since it was a Saturday there weren't many people there. it crowded during the week by students. the corner the waiter took us had another flower, thats something I had never noticed all this while. she got us the menu and served me wine and him diet coke. He did not drink. I did not know that you guys serve wine, was my immediate comment!

No, maam, sir left us with this bottle 30 mins back and asked us to serve it. Now this was too much for me...and too much to expect from the 'tornado' i knew.. I just looked at him... he smiled...this is date, girl, so lets have fun... I never ever imagined in my dream that 'tornedo' can ever take out anybody for a date or be so sensitive and romantic..everything he did that day was like the right thing, the right time...the right way.. he was Mr. Right for that day...we knew what each of us liked...since we had eaten there a zillion times...we ate and talked.. and I kept asking him..why did he decide for a date, and did not even ask me, bla bla bla...

"he had only two things to say - surprise and I wanted to do this for you and make you smile. today's day is all about you and for you. tomorrow I might not be the same. but today is for you. everything that I had wanted to do for you"

for the first time, the insensitive, unemotional, restless, pig - touched my heart with his warmth, calm and solitude. we became one that day. Such is making love. You do it for the other, because the other is none but you..you love the other, so much that you feel one.. your I and you merges to one...you are so much into each other that the place, the ambiance does not matter.. two together is a world so complete..... silent, calm, peaceful...

offcourse I was in tears many times...and he would make me laugh..we walked back..we hugged...we talked...we smiled...and through the whole process we had made love in the most brilliant and creative way that one could has ever done before.. it was bliss...by the time we reached home, we did not want to let go of each other...we talked and talked the whole night...the physical expression of love at that point was nothing compared to what we had experienced through out the evening...

we had slept off chatting ...next morning...when we woke up... he had his half tucked shirt, the dirty blue cap...and the dog chain around his neck...

I was like 'where the hell, did these things come from?'

It was in my pocket and I had left them here before we went out yesterday..I know you don't like them...but I cannot be a gentleman like yesterday everyday :) I am a man and I need sex, I cannot make love everyday...I have to be in my tornado girl...

I was laughing my gut out...and I hugged him back...and thanked god, for dispatching such a brilliant person, behind the dirty shirt and jean.....


Blog Disclaimer - all opinion expressed here are purely mine and has no association with any fictional soul :)