He is nice, decent, generous and a gentleman.
He is interested in me, and takes no effort in hiding it either .....
and to add to my disappointment He dances as well !!!
THEN WHAT's THE FREAKING PROBLEM ?????
well, I do not feel attracted towards him :(( !!
Man, its so cruel to be with someone or trying to be with someone when you feel nothing !!
I was having a conversation with a friend. And he suggested that 'attraction and emotional' department work together. They do not work in isolation. Specifically for us who have evolved with having both. You cannot change to having just one and not the other!!
It kinda made sense. I am not sure. If that's really the case. I was very happily attracted to the
lethal big bang and there was no emotion there at all. So then what's the problem ?
I tried to question, think and understand for this behavior of mine. Am not sure if that's the complete story but this is what it is for now -
I think am not attracted to whites :) physically
It's a good realization. Atleast I know what does not work. But then it means I have to be with a 'brown' man !!!
And that means - Indians or Africans or Any darker shades !!
Which means am screwed because am absolutely fed up or convinced that I cannot be with Indians. They are just too typical and conventional for me to deal with. They can't deal with me and I can't deal with them. Period. Am completely over them when thinking of a long term thing! NO, that's not possible !! Phew!!!
What's my problem with them? Well I think I should start with what's not my problem with them ????
1. Shady - They have too much of stuff under the hidden basket !! I do not feel comfortable at all if I have to think and interact. I love to be honest, free and frank. That's exactly why I like going out with 'whites' I can completely be myself. Honesty is something that just turns me 'On' :) or makes me 'comfortable'
2. Independent - They just can't decide for themselves. They will need acceptance or recommendation from their maternal uncle, 2nd cousin, third cousin etc etc... to 2nd their choice or selection. Am being racial but I cannot help appreciate how the non-browns atleast are exploring and trying to find out what they want! Atleast they take responsibility of their actions and choices!
3. Availability - The most difficult and challenging situation is to find a 'brown' man in my shoes and still single!!! The only brown single and available men in my age group are the one's who have never been with women, or been in relationships!
4. Wishy washy - Yah, I hate wishy washy people! I don't know what or why - But it freaks me out or rather turns me off completely when I met men, who don't know what they want in life! They do things because they are supposed to!
5. Classification system - Yes, its disappointing but even in today's generation people go with the classification system you fall into ! Mind it there are lot of classification system available in the brown society I belong to - numerology, sun signs, moon signs, states, community, region, religion, which caste blood you have, u eat meat or not....and the classification system gets complicated and complicated. I mean which one do you follow? Which one does your ancestor's believe in most? Which classification ensures that you have the best mate to produced offsprings!!! I can go on and on on this topic !! Mind it this classification system is taken more seriously than what you, your heart, mind, soul or body feels ! Basically for most there is a strong KNOT between happiness and classification system!! phew give me a break ! I can't deal with all this crap for sure !
Every time somebody asks me 'whats your date and time of birth'. My straight answer to it has been 4:15 - 4:25 pm. To my surprise some even ask why its not a single time!! (I have faced this question many times in my life. And my reply to it has been what the following para conveys)
It surprises me, no it disappoints me to even think that they are unaware of the time involved of the child birth process starting from labor to the final delivery. I don't know of any human soul who has taken birth in an exact second unless that soul is only born with a head, or just one arm or just feet!! And which time is more significant when the body comes out or when the body is first formed?
Logically my brain says, that the actual conceiving or the fusion of a sperm and ovum is what can be somewhat translated to the actual time and second when that soul/body was formed! Biologically even that fusion takes considerable time but yes it can be defined or quantified in Hour, Minutes and Seconds ! I am sorry but I cannot help think other way!
Hence its a CATCH 22 situation.
I meet single, confident, independent, straight forward men BUT I can't do anything with them as am not attracted to him physically! And some the above mentioned single, confident, independent, straight forward package comes ONLY in 'white'
I meet brown tall dark handsome hot deal packages BUT I can't do anything with them either as am not attracted to them mentally !!
SHIT !!!!
Wish I can separate the bonding between the Mental and Emotional department to take a practical stab at life! I really want to get out of this dangerous CATCH 22 !!
The only possible solution that comes to my head at this point is "Choose the white package I like and then buy a tanning lotion to make them brown" :)) Because doing the other way round is hell lot of a job and I just do not have the patience and time for it! And more importantly am not interested in changing someone or anyone!
Anybody has any better solution ????
Don't give me the bullshit of time, patience, and things will fall in place !! Give me a practical solution if you have! Else just listen and accept it with a pinch of salt or brown sugar :)
:(((( I need to get over this CATCH 22 situation !!!
He is interested in me, and takes no effort in hiding it either .....
and to add to my disappointment He dances as well !!!
THEN WHAT's THE FREAKING PROBLEM ?????
well, I do not feel attracted towards him :(( !!
Man, its so cruel to be with someone or trying to be with someone when you feel nothing !!
I was having a conversation with a friend. And he suggested that 'attraction and emotional' department work together. They do not work in isolation. Specifically for us who have evolved with having both. You cannot change to having just one and not the other!!
It kinda made sense. I am not sure. If that's really the case. I was very happily attracted to the
lethal big bang and there was no emotion there at all. So then what's the problem ?
I tried to question, think and understand for this behavior of mine. Am not sure if that's the complete story but this is what it is for now -
I think am not attracted to whites :) physically
It's a good realization. Atleast I know what does not work. But then it means I have to be with a 'brown' man !!!
And that means - Indians or Africans or Any darker shades !!
Which means am screwed because am absolutely fed up or convinced that I cannot be with Indians. They are just too typical and conventional for me to deal with. They can't deal with me and I can't deal with them. Period. Am completely over them when thinking of a long term thing! NO, that's not possible !! Phew!!!
What's my problem with them? Well I think I should start with what's not my problem with them ????
1. Shady - They have too much of stuff under the hidden basket !! I do not feel comfortable at all if I have to think and interact. I love to be honest, free and frank. That's exactly why I like going out with 'whites' I can completely be myself. Honesty is something that just turns me 'On' :) or makes me 'comfortable'
2. Independent - They just can't decide for themselves. They will need acceptance or recommendation from their maternal uncle, 2nd cousin, third cousin etc etc... to 2nd their choice or selection. Am being racial but I cannot help appreciate how the non-browns atleast are exploring and trying to find out what they want! Atleast they take responsibility of their actions and choices!
3. Availability - The most difficult and challenging situation is to find a 'brown' man in my shoes and still single!!! The only brown single and available men in my age group are the one's who have never been with women, or been in relationships!
4. Wishy washy - Yah, I hate wishy washy people! I don't know what or why - But it freaks me out or rather turns me off completely when I met men, who don't know what they want in life! They do things because they are supposed to!
5. Classification system - Yes, its disappointing but even in today's generation people go with the classification system you fall into ! Mind it there are lot of classification system available in the brown society I belong to - numerology, sun signs, moon signs, states, community, region, religion, which caste blood you have, u eat meat or not....and the classification system gets complicated and complicated. I mean which one do you follow? Which one does your ancestor's believe in most? Which classification ensures that you have the best mate to produced offsprings!!! I can go on and on on this topic !! Mind it this classification system is taken more seriously than what you, your heart, mind, soul or body feels ! Basically for most there is a strong KNOT between happiness and classification system!! phew give me a break ! I can't deal with all this crap for sure !
Every time somebody asks me 'whats your date and time of birth'. My straight answer to it has been 4:15 - 4:25 pm. To my surprise some even ask why its not a single time!! (I have faced this question many times in my life. And my reply to it has been what the following para conveys)
It surprises me, no it disappoints me to even think that they are unaware of the time involved of the child birth process starting from labor to the final delivery. I don't know of any human soul who has taken birth in an exact second unless that soul is only born with a head, or just one arm or just feet!! And which time is more significant when the body comes out or when the body is first formed?
Logically my brain says, that the actual conceiving or the fusion of a sperm and ovum is what can be somewhat translated to the actual time and second when that soul/body was formed! Biologically even that fusion takes considerable time but yes it can be defined or quantified in Hour, Minutes and Seconds ! I am sorry but I cannot help think other way!
Hence its a CATCH 22 situation.
I meet single, confident, independent, straight forward men BUT I can't do anything with them as am not attracted to him physically! And some the above mentioned single, confident, independent, straight forward package comes ONLY in 'white'
I meet brown tall dark handsome hot deal packages BUT I can't do anything with them either as am not attracted to them mentally !!
SHIT !!!!
Wish I can separate the bonding between the Mental and Emotional department to take a practical stab at life! I really want to get out of this dangerous CATCH 22 !!
The only possible solution that comes to my head at this point is "Choose the white package I like and then buy a tanning lotion to make them brown" :)) Because doing the other way round is hell lot of a job and I just do not have the patience and time for it! And more importantly am not interested in changing someone or anyone!
Anybody has any better solution ????
Don't give me the bullshit of time, patience, and things will fall in place !! Give me a practical solution if you have! Else just listen and accept it with a pinch of salt or brown sugar :)
:(((( I need to get over this CATCH 22 situation !!!
2 comments:
Answer to your problem: DENZEL WASHINGTON!
ha ha ha :)) ROFL...phone, email, postal address saab kuch bhejo :)) LOL !!!
Post a Comment